Doctor Who party

Time

Time is something that I've never considered a friend. It's too slow when I need it to speed up. It's too fast when I need it to slow down. Now, in my 30's, I'm seeing that Time IS my friend. Time is a gift from Father/Mother/God. It is there for us to learn to slow down and smell the coffee. It's there for us to learn to hurry up, and always be there when we are needed. Time is something that we can bend to suit our needs, and that can bend us to suit someone/something else. Like most things, the affect or effect of Time is something that we must choose.

Choice is something that frightens some, and liberates others. Choice is what makes us human, and gives us a leg up on other animal species. It is what defines Free Will. "They" say human beings are the only ones who have free will. The longer I watch Phynn, I bed to differ that point. Phynn makes his own decisions. He decides when he eats. He decides when he sleeps. Phynn decides when I sleep for that matter!

Caprica College - The Place of Dreams

Today was a great day for me. I'm completely exhausted, terrified, apprehensive, but excited and thrilled! I'm finally a College Student once again! Unfortunately I'm having to take a computer class that I've already had at another school, but the credit didn't transfer. That's okay, because that class was in teh 90's, and I'm positive programs have changed a wee bit. LOL I'm also taking an art class, and among the choices of art classes was a film appreciation class. I'm rather looking forward to that one. However, the instructor is at NE campus, and it says there is a lab. I'm hoping that lab is simply watching certain films, and that I don't have to end up going to NE campus all that often...AT ALL. My secret is: After looking at the cost of books for the computer class, I'm strongly thinking about getting out of that, and taking a sociology class that I'm sure I need for my degree anyway. We'll see what happens.

Tonight was a 5 hour marathon of the last 5 episodes of Caprica. They had canceled the show last fall, which thoroughly ticked off multitudes of people. However, in true SyFy style, although they had massive public outcry (like the did with Firefly!), they still canceled. Anyway, they stopped showing the remaining episodes that they had already filmed and had in post production! The only people who were supposed to be able to see it were Canadians and anyone who bought Caprica on DVD. Bastards! LOL Syfy grew a damn brain, and showed the remaining 5 episodes tonight. I didn't know anything about it until yesterday, and I watch SyFy all the time. Their marketing department SUCKS! They can't produce great shows like Firefly and Caprica because they don't advertise them....so no one watches them until it's too late. However, a stupid ass movie about a piranah and octopus have a love child, and it tries to destroy the world is marketed to death! Typical morons. Next, they will market a movie about pot smoking Yeti's from outerspace...oh wait....they already have!

Anyway, I got to see the end of my show, and get signed up for classes! YAY! Go me! LOL Ask and ye shall receive! LOL

Morning meditation 1/4/2011

It is still very strange writing or typing 2011. I'm sometimes reminded that we are coming closer and closer to December 21,2012, then I laugh. It's not that I discount the hypothesis, I believe that there is a possibility that 12/21/12 will be an "apocalyptic" day. However, I don't trust the notion. There is a fundamental difference there. Do we really expect that the Mayans had nothing better to do than make a calendar that goes on and on to eternity? I don't think so. They had to stop sometime! That said, if something Does happen on that day, I will not be surprised! LOL

As for me, I am looking to the future. I'm trying to live in the here and now, and be present. However, it's the future I'm looking too. I found out tonight that Tarrant County College is offering the education classes at south campus now. I've been very frustrated with TCC for years, because any programs worth taking were all at campuses that were clear on the other side of the county. Tarrant county is a BIG county! Now, they are offering just what I need at the nearest campus to me (once I get moved!). Only a certain number of credits transfer to university, and I'm almost at that number. I can probably go another semester or two at TCC, but hey, it's cheaper than university! My next big decision: What university do I transfer too?!
I'm looking at all the Universities in the DFW area. I want to stick to the ones in Fort Worth, maybe Arlington. That leaves me with Texas Christian University, Texas Wesleyan, and University of Texas at Arlington. TCU and TWU are great schools, but they are private and the tuition and fees totals approx. $31,000/year. UTA's tuition and fees come out to about $8,000/year. I'd LOVE to go to TCU, to be honest. However, I'm sure it's going to be UTA. LOL Maybe they will have a park and ride to UTA from Fort Worth?! LOL Yeah right! The bright spot to having to drive into Arlington 2-3 times a week for classes? I can go eat at Cafe Pulido's for lunch!! hahahaha

Let me think of my Spiritual lesson of the day.....oh yes! Brenda and I were talking earlier about blind faith, and how we were taught that blind faith is only applicable when you are speaking about spiritual matters. My argument was that spiritual matters shouldn't be a matter of it's own. Every matter is a spiritual matter, because Mother/Father/God is in everything, is everywhere, just simply IS. Therefore, no matter what the matter, it IS a spiritual matter. Hence, blind faith applies to all aspects of life. I'm not saying that anyone should walk about with their heads in the clouds, and never look to life. I'm not saying that at all. I'm just saying, that sometimes blind faith applies when you are being bossy, demanding, or when you just have the "But I want it NOWS!" Father/Mother/God will give you what you need, when you need it, and how. What you want, when you want it, and how you want it matters very little. For me, this is where blind faith comes in. I *generally* don't sweat things much anymore. Example: I want a house with a yard. I go on blind faith that Mother/Father/God has already chosen just the right place for us to be in the moment. I KNOW that it is provided, and it's only a matter of timing of when it will presented to me. Does that mean that I don't go out and drive around, write down addresses and phone numbers of rent houses? No, absolutely not! It means that when I find the right one, Father/Mother/God will let me know. I wouldn't be surprised if it wasn't one on Wonder Dr, or Wonder Ct! LOL

I need to go to bed now, because I'm supposed to get up in the morning and go to TCC to try to get registered for classes. On one hand I'm excited!! On the other, I don't wanna get up!! Oh well, such is life.

Morning Meditation 1/2/11

God is absolute good, everywhere present. There is no opposing power in the universe, only God. If there is only God in the universe, then we are expressions of God. I'm listening to a podcast of a Unity Church of Fort Worth sermon from several weeks. I'm finally understanding on a human level what Oneness really means. It's not that we are one bride of the church, but one consciousness with God. There's such a vast difference in the meanings. It amazes me how much I already understand, yet how little.

Rev. Roach is saying that when we were kids and were taught that God is this old man with a long flowing white beard sitting on a throne int he clouds, that we were being taught that God is outside of ourselves. It is kind of limiting on how close you can feel to a creator who is so high above you, not just figuratively but also literally. When you think of how God is in everything, he sees everything, he knows everything, he is always, then in my mind for as long as I can remember the concept of a divine creator, I've always wondered, "if He is so far up there, and out of reach, then how much can he care about little ole me?" The truth of the matter is, He isn't anywhere, he isn't in any space and time. To say that limits his omnipotence. God is We. We are in all things, at all times, in all space. The God consciousness that we are born with comes to light in the darkest of hours. God is good, God is great. We are good, We are great.

"Constantly regard the universe as one living being, having one substance and one soul; and observe how all things have reference to one perception, the perception of this one living being; and how all things act with one movement; and how all things are the cooperating causes of all things which exist; observe too the continuous spinning of the thread and the contexture of the web."
- Marcus Aurelius

Morning Meditation of 1/1/11

My meditation this morning focuses on the many blessings I have received throughout 2010. It has been a great year, as far as I'm concerned. Not that it wasn't wrought with some pain and sorrow. Yet, it ended on a high note. Several, actually. On New Years Eve I found myself driving around an unfamiliar area of Fort Worth. I was looking for a new place to live in order to start fresh, have a yard for Phynn, and be closer to school and church. I never thought I'd talk about ME in Church again. It's a bit foreign, and strange. lol I was given a set of Archangel Michael oracle cards. I've been worrying myself sick about whether or not we can afford to move, to live in a place that will cost us more than we are already paying, etc... I was told over and over again, and in no uncertain terms to stop worrying. That a place had already been chose, and "the situation has already been resolved." I thought, "Whatever that means!" I've left it at that. I'm going with blind faith that I will be lead to the right place, the right time, the right cost, everything will be....Right! LOL As I was driving around looking for a new place, getting frustrated, I realized something. I had yet to pray and ask Mother/Father/God and the angels to lead me to the place that has already been chosen for me. I turned off of a street, and onto another and remarked aloud that I needed to live on this street called Wonder. What a wonderful name for a street.....as I feel as though my life is finding wonder in every aspect again. All the wonder had left me for so long, I'd lost my sense of it. It's like in the new Alice in Wonderlad, the Hatter tells Alice that she's lost her "Muchness." I think that's what I call Wonder. I've lost my Muchness, my wonder. So, living on a street called Wonder would be a daily reminder to keep hold of my muchness, and always live in my Wonder! So, as I pull onto Wonder Street, I pray, "Mother/Father/God, holy angels, I can't believe I've not asked you this yet, but would you please help me find the place that has already....." at this point, I look up and there are 2 rent houses, one across from the other, that appear to be perfect for us! AND, they are on Wonder Street and Wonder Drive! I can't wait to call for the information, and I pray that though we have some financial worries, we will find a great landlord, in a great neighborhood, with great neighbors, and that I will always keep my sense of Wonder and Muchness!

Morning Meditation of 12/31/2010

I am a night owl, so my morning meditations are actually my evening meditations before bed.

On this New Years Eve morning, before I go to sleep, I ponder the many blessings Father/Mother/God has given me in the past several weeks. Almost everything I've asked for has been provided for me, and the rest is hinging on a major life decision - and the action that comes from said decision. Tonight I thanked Spirit for providing me with the many wonders of life, even when I don't appreciate them in the moment. On Christmas Eve I attended services at Unity Church of Fort Worth, and we had a candle lighting ceremony to herald in Christ Consciousness, and the love that Jesus himself spread throughout the world. At the bottom of each candle, wrapped lovingly, there was an affirmation. You couldn't see exactly what it was, or know what it said. Rev. Paul Roach said that the affirmations would speak to us either now, or in the near future, so we should hold on to them. Mine said, "You see the glory of God in all aspects of your life." This is something that I've had a very hard time doing. I know that the glory is there. I know that I only have to open my true eyes to see the glory. However, when the ego takes hold, we as human beings forget that to truly see the glory, we must detach from the human mortal world, and see with our spiritual eyes, not the human ones. As my consciousness shifts I'm finding that I no longer enjoy certain destructive behaviors, such as cursing, gossiping, worrying, etc... Instead I crave positivity to be all around me.

Tonight I spoke with Mother/Father/God, and decided to write myself a simple blog to remind myself of what message I received. The first passage I was lead too (which I cannot recall what book or passage it was from), spoke of a journey. I have been asking for help on decisions to be made about my path, and fearful of where it would lead...not to mention of the time, money and work it would take to travel this path. Father/Mother/God has provided me with archangels Michael and Gabriel to watch over me while I travel this path to wherever Spirit leads me. The second passage I received was Zechariah 2:10-13.

¹⁰Sing and rejoice, O daughter Zion! For lo, I will come and dwell in your midst, says the Lord. ¹¹Many nations shall join themselves to the Lord on that day, and shall be my people; and I will dwell in your midst. And you shall know that the Lord of hosts has sent me to you. ¹²The Lord will inherit Judah as his portion in the holy land, and will again choose Jerusalem.

13 Be silent, all people, before the Lord; for he has roused himself from his holy dwelling.

Possible interpretation:

2:10-13 Here is a prediction of the coming of Christ in human nature. Many nations in that day would renounce idolatry, and God will own those for his people who join him with purpose of heart. Glorious times are foretold as a prophecy of our Lord's coming and kingdom. God is about to do something unexpected, and very surprising, and to plead his people's cause, which had long seemed neglected. Silently submit to his holy will, and patiently wait the event; assured that God will complete all his work.

Personally, I believe Spirit is telling me that my journey towards Christ Consciousness is on track. "Sing and rejoice, O daughter of Zion: for lo, I come, and I will dwell in the midst of thee, saith the Lord." This is the unification between my spirit, and that of The Great Spirit.

The Shift

Modern day mystics, new agists, and teachers alike all agree on one specific thing. Things happen at a time in which they are meant to happen. You recognize coincidences to a point in which they become more than coincidence. You see the meaning behind many things that normally would have no meaning. YOu can even find a deeper meaning to piece of film, a song, a poem, that you would otherwise gloss over. These images, sounds, feelings, whatever the piece invokes is what is meant for you to have to help you on this leg of your journey. Things happen for a reason, in a time in which Spirit means for them to happen. The key is to see these "things" as something that is happening for you, not to you. Each event, whether you perceive them as good or bad, is a gift from Spirit letting you find your true path. There isn't one set path for each of us, that we must stay on and never stray unless we want to end up in a horrible situation, lost and defeated for the rest of our lives. We have paths that converge each and every day. As spiritual beings we know and understand the greater purpose of this convergence, but as human beings, we allow our egos to muddle up our minds. We forget to see a tree as a grand canopy to protects and is a life bringer, instead we see a big Tree. It is more than it's label. We are more then our label. I am Tasha, born in West Texas during September of 1976. However, my authentic self is someone who loves life on a soul level, I am passionate about writing and ideas and words. I love to connect to Spirit, even when I forget how to. I love being no one is a sea of people, and just being the observer. I love the sound of nature, even though I do not like insects. I find peace and solice in piano and violin concertos. I am one with Spirit, not outside of it. Tonight I experienced a shift at 12:37am, December 30, 2010.

A Beauty's Fairytale

Young Amiyra asked her mother what kind of dress she should wear to the dance. Her mother replied, "What ever makes you feel beautiful, Amiyra." She went to her vast closet of every kind of clothing made, in every color, with all the hot labels, and picked a tattered, faded, blue dress. Her mother scoffed at the horrible rag, and asked, "What on earth are you doing with such a terrible excuse for a dress even in your closet?" Amiyra said, "Mother, it is the blue dress that you wore when you went on your first date with Father. I always thought the pictures of you in it were so beautiful." Again, the mother scoffed. She couldn't believe the audactiy of the young girl even thinking she would leave the house wearing such a thing. What would the neighbors think? What would the pastor think? What would strangers think? It was all too much for Mother, so she excused herself from the room. Mother was a strong woman, but sometimes her daughters choices were too much for her, so she found herself making way to her favorite spot in the house: her bedroom with the bottle of valium on the nightstand. All Mother could do is think to herself, "What is wrong with that child?" She blamed herself. Mother believed she hugged and kissed Amiyra too much when she smaller, and this was the child's downfall. Amiyra primped and coiffed her beautiful face and hair, and put the tattered rag of a dress on just as the Rolls Royce pulled up in the driveway. "Mother!" she called. "Mother, I'm leaving now!" Mother didn't answer, only grunted an exasperated sigh. Upon arival at the dance, there were girls in Michael Kors, Vera Wang, Gianni Versace, and some were even in pathetic little Jessica McClintock frocks. Silly girls who can only afford the later should just stay home, or at least that was the buzz around the limo set. From inside the Rolls Royce, which was the hit of the parking lot, Amiyra prepared to step out into the limelight of the High School social scene and make her grand entrance. Everyone waited with baited breathe to see who came to the dance in a Rolls Royce. When the door opened, everyone stood with smiles and wide eyed, until they caught a glimpse of the tattered blue dress Amiyra wore. Laughter slowly came over the crowd, and not to hushed whispers could be heard saying, "What is THAT?! "What was she thinking?" "What a pathetic git!" "OMG, can you say UGLY?!" Amiyra just smiled to herself, because she wore the one thing that no one else she knew had. The one thing that all the other women in her life lacked, and desperately desired: Confidence. With that confidence came a beauty that none other could match. When Amiyra entered the dance, there stood a boy in a powder blue tuxedo, and sneakers. He'd been the butt of jokes until that very moment. No one else, the entire night, had a better time than the two most confidendtly, worst dressed students of the night. Ten years later, another dance for the same students was planned. Flying off the racks were Michael Kors, Vera Wang, Gianni Versace, and yes, even pathetic Jessica McClintock frocks. There was a buzz in the returning class looking for just the right dress, tux, botox doctor, physical trainers and the like. The night of the dance, everyone mingled unsuredly. They found themselves having to remind one another who they were. However, when the beautiful Rolls Royce pulled up in the parking lot, everyone remembered the poorly dressed princess in the tattered blue dress. From inside the motor carriage sat the same girl, ten years old, ten years wiser, ten years more confident. Amiyra stepped out of the car and onto the concrete step wearing a beautiful blue dress that everyone at the reunion dance envied. When they all asked her who designed the frock, she replied, "Why, I did! I designed it after the beautiful dress I wore to our dance many years ago!" The people scoffed wondering how in the world she think that dress was beautiful! At the end of the night, Amiyra was a hit. There was no more laughing, gossiping, or judging her clothes. When Amiyra left he reunion dance, she stood on the steps of the auditorium and looked up to the heaves and smiled. Suddenly the beautiful blue dress returned to its normal state of tatters and rags. Amiyra laughed to herself and made her way back to her lovingly beautiful life. The moral of the story: Beauty comes from confidence, and exuding such confidence can glamor all around you.